poems

These are some poems I've written over the past few years. Most of my poems are free style, stream of consciousness type stuff, and many of them are not printed here for various reasons. Scroll down to find one that you want to check out.

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figured

she comes up to me and with those sparkling eyes says
'like, oh my god..i like, totally figured it out....'
....and she meant it.....

i really wanted to live that long
so i could figure it out
i always wanted to know what all the reasons for living were
so i could just sleep
i thought that god would maybe show up
reveal himself somehow
and he would tell me how much they'd talked about how many secrets we keep

and i did
i figured it out
i figured out that everyone is surely uncertain of themselves
and of the others
why they're afraid of the others
afraid they'll know what they're about
they're all afraid that someone's looking inside to see them
but i figured it out

and i figured you knew it
i didn't need to explain
i didn't need to explain you shoulda known before i told you
i was looking inside
cause i was looking in deeper
i saw what things you had there
i saw the things you had hidden that were causing you pain
because i figured it out

so she came up to me and said it
she said i figured it out
she said i figured that you knew me but somehow even better
than i knew myself, right?
and then she looked in the mirror
and started drifting away
she started drifting away but she was feeling too weak to put up any fight

and i told her that she knew it
she knew i'd understand
she said she thought that i could read her and could tell her
about all the things that couldn't be said
she had that look that said she knew it
and like she figured it out
she instinctively knew most people never see the picture until after they're dead



4-6-00 late

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bleeding

she's bleeding
again
she's bleeding
and i hardly even touched her

she's bleeding
and i hate her for her weakness cause it
just reminds me so much of myself

she's bleeding
again

this time it's really over nothing and she
thinks that i should maybe start
watching what i say
she fears that i'll hurt their feelings
again

or she fears i'll hurt her feelings
once again

she's falling
and i can't reach out to save her
no matter how i try it's just that
nothing gets too simple
it's that always convoluted and confusing to her now
and now she's saying that again
so that i don't believe her now her name is lisa
she told me that’s her name she said I’m lisa
mr. steiner’s only girl
the one who’s always been in pain
the one who’s suffered and who’s bled a thousand
times before she met me now she
just wants to be held

she keeps on
bleeding
and there it is again
she's bleeding

again

i really don’t think I can help her
she's simply got to learn those big hard
lessons
things i already know she's gotta get
tougher
that's why i'm hard on her
it's for her own damn good
like i've been telling you
sometimes she won't even listen and i
feel i'm forced to have to bear on down

what would she do if i didn't
where'd she be right now
my little angel
the one i love so well
my little bleeder
my precious little innocent one
who needs me all the time
so i'll protect you
and you won't say what they've done
for your own protection
you don't want me to go away
it's another sad lesson
for a life so full of pain

and you're my bleeder
you're bleeding again
she's bleeding
she's really bleeding again

that's the last thing i want

because I
can't
help
her..
and she’s
bleeding..
and bleeding
again




written by joe herbert, copyright 8-4-98


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Time

Time is my friend-Time is my enemy
Time gets us all eventually
time goes on and on, time stands still
time is ticking away I watch from my windowsill

I watch the clock ticking noiselessly
it seems to mock me cause I used to be free
from all this pressure that keeps coming around
and I want to get away from the silent sound

Of time..it used to be my best friend
but now our relationship has come to an end
I don't know what I used to do with my time
but now I feel my blood pressure starting to climb

Time was my friend now it's my enemy
time gets us all you know eventually
time passes by and nothing changes for the good
If time heals all wounds, you know I wish it would

The day is passing, and I'm hopeless to move at all
I need a real excuse just to walk down the hall
I want a better reason to continue my life
as I stare at the blade of a sharpened knife

I contemplate what a thousand others have before
only this time I think I know what they did it for
the only question is the manner and note
I'd like to see the last things the famous people wrote

Time was my friend, now it's my enemy
Time will get us all you know eventually
time can go flying by or time can stand still
I watch the world go by from inside my windowsill

I used to have everything a person could want
because I had you, I could afford to flaunt
I always thought that time was on my side
but then you went away and mortally wounded my pride

Now I have no desire to even leave my home
I can only imagine all the places you roam
and while you're out enjoying all the things that time
could provide I'm cowered in a corner contemplating suicide

Time was your friend, now it's your enemy
Time will get you all eventually
Time will go flying by and time will never stand still
Time will catch up with you all, You know that it will



durham, new hampshire, 10-26-92

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Skin

I met you
in the middle of a bunch of
people
who looked just like one another
but you shined
you glowed
I could pick you out of a crowded
city street
so original so
beautiful
but we were both with someone else

I saw you again
we were both at a party
too bored to even care what was going on
You told me that you didn't always
hug everybody so
easily
like all the other phonies that surrounded you and me

But we embraced
and it felt good
We shared a story about
a death in the family
and we connected on that spot and we
shared something more

I can see your face right now
even though you're
living so far away
I miss you

I saw you at a party this summer
i cut off all my hair
you didn't even know me then
and you thought I was too
fresh too
familiar, too
knowing for a stranger
to be

I think about you now and I
want to just embrace you and
hold you for so long and so tight

I heard some news that you were
involved with someone
in a high risk group
and when I finally saw you again
you were only skin and bones
yet your beauty was still there
still clear, shining through
glowing

I can see your face
even now that you're gone
for good
and I know I'll never
have that chance
to see your face
again



dover, new hampshire, 1989

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invisible

i'm invisible- nothing to offer here
so you make me disappear my thoughts and feelings
and especially my opinions simply do not matter
i see the way you look at us, but your eyes
are never curious
enough to look at me because you have
no use for me cause i'm invisible

you've seen my kind before and so in
order to not waste time you sum me
up and turn me down and then just
go about your life until i'm gone
-i'm invisible

but i might not be going -i might just stay right here in my
so meek unimportance
but i won't show my fear
that i'm small, not good enough, for some-
one as cool as you
-i stay invisible

i stay invisible-i don't feel
out of place -there's no change on my face
i stepped out of the race
i'll let you set the pace cause i'm invisible

i'm invisible
but i might not be going...i might just stay right here in my
so meek unimportance, i won't show any fear, no longer
small, but good enough for some-
one as cool as
you say i'm invisible

you expect me to shrink into the couch in the
corner you'd like me to slouch because you
got the room's attention
and i don't even have to mention
that you will not take a seat
you stand there with conceit
judging all us peons as we
ask permission to speak

you must have known all along that someone
else would be as strong as you and
put you in your place
now you can step out of the race
i insist you take my seat
there's someone you need to meet
you won't suffer defeat
i might even let you cheat
and i'll stand out in the street and tell
everyone i meet that you're invisible


san rafael, california, november 1999

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i know

i know
that you don't
think that you could make it on your own
without me
without
somebody to take your hand
and guide you through it
but you can do it
because i've been there

just like you
and i know it's true
life can be unfair
like no one cares
but you have to hold on
cause in te end that's all you have
is yourself
to hold on to

and i know
that sometimes
life can really suck
feels like you're totally stuck
somewhere in the middle
like life's a riddle
that you can never figure out
what life's about
but just hold on
it's ok to be alone
cause sometimes
that's all you have

yeah and i know
that it's lonesome and you're scared
to be on your own
out there alone
seems someone should be there
to help you along
to watch over and guide you
pick you up after you fall

but it's not always like that
sometimes it's tougher
than you can handle
but just hold on
and you'll learn to shine
you'll do just fine
and in the end you'll know
that it was worth it
in the end

because you took a chance
though you were scared to dance
you walked out alone
into that fire
and you'll never go back
once you've had the taste
of life that way
and i'll wait for you

wait for you to say
that you don't need me
and that's when i'll need you
to help me get through
when i'm scared and alone
wondering where to go
or what i'll do
without you
in the end

occoquan, va, 9-22-99

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first one

every night, when i’m saying goodnight to you
i hold you closer than i maybe I think I should
or thought i could
i whisper sweet little nothings in your ear
things i’m sure not even the spirits up there could hear
i don’t know the reason why i get so secretive

maybe it’s cause i think you’re the reason i live
and maybe i don’t want to share you
with anyone else even if that’s wrong and i just want to
hold you so tight, now i have you all to myself
there’s nothing you can say to make me change my mind
because i’ve waited for you, it seems from the beginning of time
i wish i could sleep with you all night
feel your heart beat next to mine
i’d know you were mine
but there’s no room in your little bed

some people tell me that i should share you with the others
maybe give you a chance to have a sister or a brother
but i just want to give you the time that i never had myself
the things i’d only wished for when i was in your shoes

i want this chance to make everything right again
like i got one more and this time i’m making it right
this time
and nobody’s gonna ever take you away no matter
what they say or what they think they’ll do
cause you’re the one thing in my life that’s unconditional
that’s real that’s true that’s
always gonna love me back the way i love you
and i do
i love you



dover, nh 1990

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fear

i have this fear of a blank page
fear of a blank tape
fear that you're totally right
fear that i did something unforgivable
fear that i don't know what i'm doing
fear that you're gonna pass me by
fear that i should have done something different this time
fear that someone somewhere's gonna find something wrong with what i said
fear that you won't approve of what i did
fear that i'm running out of time
fear that i'm getting old
fear that someone somewhere will be younger than me
fear that reminds me of the hunger that i used to know
fear that i might be right, but you'll never understand
i got a fear that i might be afraid of what's around the next bend
fear that i won't jump off the cliff that i told you all about
fear that i should have never cut my hair
fear that the fear that i'm talking about is real
fear that maybe what i worked at all this time is bullshit
fear that i might just get too greedy and never know what i had in you
fear that the last slot will already be taken when i get there
fear that everything you said about me was true and that i'll
never be able to explain it all and i'm afraid that my fear and my
kharma will never be on track again as long as i live

in fear



nokesville, va - 1995

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All poems and writings were written by joe herbert, and Copyrighted © between
1986 and 2005. Don't be making copies without permission. {keep it cool!}
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Copyright © 1986 - 2006 Joe Herbert. All rights reserved. This material
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